Divide ... conquer... unite
Wikipedia defines "divide and conquer" as : "A divide and conquer algorithm works by recursively breaking down a problem into two or more sub-problems of the same or related type, until these become simple enough to be solved directly." This is an approach that is well suited for managing any event - small or large.
More often than not, the burden of planning a wedding falls on the bride. Just a few years ago, vendors such as florists and decor team would not deal with the Groom at all. But now those days are long gone.
Planning a wedding does not have to be a task that falls solely on the bride.
Grooms are now more involved in the planning and execution of their weddings.
Here's some practical ways to "Divide... Conquer" before you "Unite" in Marriage:
1. Rely on each other's strengths
This is something that is absolutely essential as the first step of division of responsibilities. Write down the major items in the to-do list and let each person volunteer for the ones that he/she is good at. Say for example, the groom can take the responsibility of managing guest list, and the bride can the task of ordering flowers and so on. But please... leave the colors and decor to the bride. To most men, pink is one color... and does not have 14 different versions... like hot pink, fushcia, rose pink, and salmon pink - is that even a color?
2. Form a team of helpers and divide responsibilities.
In my 20 years of managing weddings, I find it surprising that couples are less than willing to ask for help from family and friends. Of course the rule of thumb is always availability and accessibility. Cousin Joe who wants to help but lives in Hawaii is not going to be of much help. But neither is Aunt Sally who happens to be an oncall Doctor. If you approach the right people and give them small chunks of tasks they can manage, it will help you a great deal.
3. Complete the common tasks first.
There are certain responsibilities and tasks that the bride and groom have to do together. Tasks such as picking a venue, picking the officiant and of course the dinner menu. Take care of these important items ahead of schedule so you have more time to work on the harder tasks. Allot extra time for tasks such as guest list management and seating chart preparations. These tasks come in the latter part of the planning and demand a bigger chunk of your time.
4. Create a budget.
Every couple should have a common place where they track the expenses. This is important so that both parties know how you are doing with finances and if any adjustments can be made. In the world of dividing responsibilties, it is easy to lose track of how much money is actually being spent on each item.
5. Get help early.
No matter how organized you are, every couple can use the help of someone who has managed various types of events. This person can help the couple forsee potential issues ahead of time and provide timely advice that will save you from buying Tylenol in bulk.
A few years ago, after I successfully managed a 600-guest wedding, the bride asked me if I can give her friend a helping hand for an upcoming wedding. I said sure I can help but when is the wedding? Her answer: in two weeks. Needless to say, it was too late to ask for help.
After you've divided and conquered the tasks, you can rest easy knowing that the day you Unite in Marriage is going to be the Best Day Ever.
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